Sherven, Judith 1943-

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SHERVEN, Judith 1943-

PERSONAL:

Born 1943; married James Sniechowski (a therapist).

ADDRESSES:

Home—Windham, NY. Agent—c/o Author Mail, 175 Fifth Avenue, New York, NY 10010. E-mail—jksjes@hotmail.com.

CAREER:

Clinical psychologist and psychotherapist. Private practice in psychology, 1978—; Institute for Advanced Training in Experiential Psychotherapy, founder and director, beginning 1981; The Magic of Differences (relationship training and consulting firm), NY, cofounder with husband, James Sniechowski; Westside Gender Reconciliation Workgroup, cofounder. With Sniechowski, conductor of training seminars, workshops, lectures, and corporate consultations; cohost, with husband, of Wisdom radio show.

WRITINGS:

WITH HUSBAND, JAMES SNIECHOWSKI

The New Intimacy: Discovering the Magic at the Heart of Your Differences, Health Communications (Deerfield Beach, FL), 1997.

Opening to Love 365 Days a Year, Health Communications (Deerfield Beach, FL), 2000.

Be Loved for Who You Really Are, Renaissance Books (Los Angeles, CA), 2001, published as Be Loved for Who You Really Are: How the Differences between Men and Women Can Be Turned into the Source of the Very Best Romance You'll Ever Know, St. Martin's Griffin (New York, NY), 2003.

Coauthor, with Sniechowski, of audiobooks, including Embracing Intimacy, Breaking through Resistance, Mothering the Girl Within, Fathering the Boy Within, Womanhood: Power, and Identity, Calling Men to Community, Sons and Fathers (three-tape series), You Are the Healer, The Healing Power of Relationships, and Preventing Domestic Violence. Coauthor of online column for Wisdom Networks, and of articles for periodicals and Web sites, including Chinese Women Today, Lightworks, Backlash!, Los Angeles Times, and Mensight.

SIDELIGHTS:

Judith Sherven, a clinical psychologist and psychotherapist, met her husband, James Sniechowksi, a doctorate in human behavior, on a blind date. They fell in love, married, and have gone on to rank among the most sought-after and respected husband-and-wife relationship counselors in the United States. With Sniechowski, Sherven has written three books, produced several cassette tapes, and published numerous articles designed to improve romantic, family, and work-related relationships. She and Sniechowski travel nationally and internationally to hold seminars and workshops based on their published materials, and have been guest experts on hundreds of television and radio shows. "We have actively put ourselves out in the public arena," commented the authors in an online interview with Jenna Glatzer for Absolute Write. "We are critical of the relationship experts and books that espouse 'techniques' and 'manipulations' for getting along. Relationships are the building blocks of society. Men and women are all there is to create civilization. How we treat each other, so goes the world!"

The couple's first book, The New Intimacy, is based on the idea that "at the heart of the new intimacy is the capacity to consciously open yourself and take in more of who your partner truly is." In the book, Sherven and Sniechowski tell readers that "we live in very challenging times, so we need to have compassion for ourselves. But there is much we can learn to make loving and being loved more rewarding and deeply fulfilling."

Sherven and Sniechowski's second book, Opening to Love 365 Days a Year, expands on some of these concepts and promotes strengthening one's ability to accept love every day, no matter what else may be going on in life. "In this book we offer you a delightful daily reminder that love must be continually created and nourished," say the authors. "We cover topics as serious as conflict and finance, as engaging as love notes and surprises. Our central message is: true love can only grow and unfold in mutual respect and value for the differences between people." The book contains many daily affirmations for couples. "Thoughtprovoking, inspiring and wise, these affirmations are little one-page teachers," explained PlanetPsych.com contributor Mike Weaver. Sherven and Sniechowski recognize that, as they comment in Opening to Love 365 Days a Year, honest communication is the key: "most people never receive any meaningful training or preparation for enjoyable, effective dating, or for creating a healthy and vital marriage."

In their third book, Be Loved for Who You Really Are, Sherven and Sniechowski encourage couples to come to a deeper understanding of each other and to base their relationship on such findings. "When you understand, emotionally and spiritually, the very real and significant fact that the other person, your partner, is truly other-different and distinct from you, in a sense a whole other world—then your relationship is not only grounded in reality, but also has its roots deep into the truth of what love can be and what the two of you can create together," the authors explain in the book. "To be loved for who you really are means to be loved in your wholeness, to be loved for the oneof-a-kind that you truly are. And that is exactly what you must return to the one you love." Sherven and Sniechowski draw on stories from their own marriage to illustrate points throughout their writings, bringing the reader into a deeper understanding not only of what he or she should be doing in a relationship, but of the inner-workings of the authors' relationship. Noting the unique nature of the book, Library Journal contributor Margaret Cardwell noted that the book's "narrative tends to have a spiritual, New Age flavor. Love is often personified, and a higher power or spirit is referenced throughout, though no particular doctrine is espoused."

BIOGRAPHICAL AND CRITICAL SOURCES:

BOOKS

Sherven, Judith, and James Sniechowski, The New Intimacy: Discovering the Magic at the Heart of Your Differences, Health Communications (Deerfield Beach, FL), 1997.

Sherven, Judith, and James Sniechowski, Opening to Love 365 Days a Year, Health Communications (Deerfield Beach, FL), 2000.

Sherven, Judith, and James Sniechowski, Be Loved for Who You Really Are: How the Differences between Men and Women Can Be Turned into the Source of the Very Best Romance You'll Ever Know, St. Martin's Griffin (New York, NY), 2003.